![]() ![]() ![]() Don’t hold anything back for fear that it might “scare him off.” If your expectations scare him, then he probably isn’t the one you’re meant to be with for the rest of your life. How long are you willing to wait for him to propose? Do you want to have children right away? How do you want to raise them? Do you want to combine finances? Where do you want to live? Pour out these desires to him. Let him know what kind of expectations you have. Marriage certainly isn’t one-sided, so these conversations shouldn’t be either. Did his parents express their love for each other well, or was their marriage defined by conflict and tension? Have other couples made a positive or negative impression on him? What important lessons has he learned from the marriages that he has seen throughout his life? What would he like to emulate, and what would he like to change? Talk about Your Expectations The marriages that he has witnessed in his life will influence his views, so ask him about the ones that have made a deep impact on him. Dive right in – those topics don’t become any less important.Īsk him what he thinks married life will look like for the two of you. And don’t dance around the serious stuff like faith, finances, and starting a family. Does he see it as a necessary evil? Does he think that divorce is an option if times get tough? Does he expect that the two of you will lead separate, but parallel lives? Or does he see marriage as a gift? Does he desire to stay by your side through the good times and bad? Does he want to become one with you and share life completely? Ask him what he thinks married life will look like for the two of you. It’s important to know not just whether or not he wants to get married, but also what his overall perspective on marriage is. If he doesn’t think marriage is in the cards, then it’s probably time to say “hasta la vista.” Ask Him about His Expectations ![]() If he looks at you like you just spoke in a foreign language, then you may want to clarify where his intentions lie. If he takes it in stride, then you can easily move forward with deeper questions about the topic. It’s okay to say things like “when we’re married” in conversations between the two of you. See how he reacts when you drop phrases like that. Really, the assumption in any solid relationship should be that you’re working towards marriage. If you’re in a serious relationship with someone, talking about the future as if you’ll still be together is not a crazy idea. If you’re not sure where to start, try these approaches: Talk about the Future The last thing you want is a dead-end relationship where you’re acting the part of his wife without actually having the commitment of marriage. So, if you’re thinking that your man is the one, then you may have to encourage some honest conversation about sealing the deal with some gold bands. Men today are increasingly resistant to marriage for a number of reasons. ![]()
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